Wow it has been an amazing week. I feel human again, I feel better than human, I feel great!! I have had a little bit of a life altering week. I think after being so stressed and so sick for so long I hit rock bottom. A couple of great people helped point out that I might not be seeing things clearly anymore and so I was almost making it worse then it actually was. I was smacked in the face with the "TODAY IS THE DAY" where I had to make big changes. I kept trying to do it all and yet couldn't but kept on trying harder and harder. A great friend told me to learn to work smart, not harder! How smart is she? Why could I have not figured this out? Thanks Kelly for helping me re-focus and find the goddess that I am and lost somewhere along the way.
One thing that happens to us moms is we lose ourselves along the way. We are almost forced to *change* the moment we become pregnant. Then we have a baby, we pour everything we have into that amazing being. We go for days without sleep, showers or even getting dressed. We miss meals, we miss taking care of ourselves we are so busy taking care of everyone around us. In all of this we lose who we were. I am not saying that we should hold onto that, we will never be that again. Now we are something a lot more important - we are a MOTHER! There is nothing better in this world, not even being a father. Sorry Hun and all the other amazing dads out there.
What is important as a mom is for us to take care of ourselves. Once put to me as self care, not selfish! If we don't take care of ourselves, if we don't put ourselves first we won't be able to take care of the ones who we love. Be selfish and think about yourself, because in many cases no one else will. If not you will end up like me. You can be on the brink of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, hit a point where you are not happy with what you feel is everyone and everything around you when in turn you are not happy with yourself. Don't try to do it all yourself - balance, balance, balance!
Who really cares if you have a spotless house, you make gourmet meals or have a great paying high powered job. Don't worry about yesterday or tomorrow. Live in today. Why cause extra stress that you have no power over. My husband said to me once when I was stressing about the economy and all the recession talk that why stress when there is no affect on us. He is right! Until the time comes that we are directly affected by this economic downturn I am not going to worry about it, after all I don't have any control over what will happen. And if I do stress then I feel like I am letting the media win. I am letting all of their scare tactics make me a worry wart.
I still feel that the most important lesson I have learned over the last month is that you MUST surround yourself with amazing people. People who truly care about you and are not all for them. Yes friends are important but I would rather have one great friend who I know I can turn to for anything then 15 friends who I know would not be there if I really needed them. They always seem to let you down, they seem to hurt you and prove that they were really not a friend. I am so thankful for the amazing women that I have in my life. They care about me and want to help me be an amazing woman - now that is a friend - thank you!
Friday, January 23, 2009
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
Oh the pain
As I sit here my head feels like it is going to explode. I can't breathe and there is nothing I can do about it. No amount of blowing will help, it is just congestion that won't go away. For days now I have been in pain. My head hurts, my neck hurts and no amount of Advil will help. I feel like I have been on Advil for weeks now.... how good can that be for me? I even pulled out the Wii Fit this morning hoping that a little work out might make me feel better. No such luck! As soon as the Advil started working for my headache, my neck started hurting. Why does this always happen to me?? (Insert pity party for me here, please I really need some sympathy!)
I have been sick for 6 weeks now. First I got hit with strep throat and after 10 days of antibiotics... the last day, yes the last day I started feeling like crap again. And the kicker was it was Christmas day. My family was all here for brunch and all I wanted to do was go back to bed. I could not believe how tired I was and it was only lunch time. After lounging around and watching Wall-E while Miss E napped we had to go to the in laws for dinner. That was okay because the last thing I wanted to do was cook dinner the way I was feeling. Came home, went to bed early and got up feeling okay. Not great, but just like I had a little cold. Did some boxing day shopping and took advantage of a great deal on jeans at Old Navy.
$15 for jeans is great! Hardest part was not being able to find a number of pairs in my size. I took 3 home and hoped they would all be great. Well one of them was a pair of skinny jeans. I don't know what these girls do but they were horrible. Maybe I just have issues with them, taking me back to a time in my life when all I want to do is forget about the horrible fashions I grew up with. They made my ass look horrible, and really did nothing for my skinny legs. I am a small person, I should be able to wear them but I can't. Even my lovingly wonderful husband who thinks I look great even when I am sick, wearing sweats and needing a shower told me that they were horrible! Oh well I still had two great pairs of boot cut jeans.
Well I should get my butt in bed. Even though I can still hear my little guy awake upstairs. 9:30pm and he is still awake, maybe it is that silly realistic cat that purrs and meows. Molly (that is what he named her) is just crying over and over, probably looking for attention! I am hoping if I go to bed early I might wake up feeling partially human tomorrow. Night all!
I have been sick for 6 weeks now. First I got hit with strep throat and after 10 days of antibiotics... the last day, yes the last day I started feeling like crap again. And the kicker was it was Christmas day. My family was all here for brunch and all I wanted to do was go back to bed. I could not believe how tired I was and it was only lunch time. After lounging around and watching Wall-E while Miss E napped we had to go to the in laws for dinner. That was okay because the last thing I wanted to do was cook dinner the way I was feeling. Came home, went to bed early and got up feeling okay. Not great, but just like I had a little cold. Did some boxing day shopping and took advantage of a great deal on jeans at Old Navy.
$15 for jeans is great! Hardest part was not being able to find a number of pairs in my size. I took 3 home and hoped they would all be great. Well one of them was a pair of skinny jeans. I don't know what these girls do but they were horrible. Maybe I just have issues with them, taking me back to a time in my life when all I want to do is forget about the horrible fashions I grew up with. They made my ass look horrible, and really did nothing for my skinny legs. I am a small person, I should be able to wear them but I can't. Even my lovingly wonderful husband who thinks I look great even when I am sick, wearing sweats and needing a shower told me that they were horrible! Oh well I still had two great pairs of boot cut jeans.
Well I should get my butt in bed. Even though I can still hear my little guy awake upstairs. 9:30pm and he is still awake, maybe it is that silly realistic cat that purrs and meows. Molly (that is what he named her) is just crying over and over, probably looking for attention! I am hoping if I go to bed early I might wake up feeling partially human tomorrow. Night all!
Sunday, January 4, 2009
Happy New Year!
Well the holidays came and went, and 2009 is here. It honestly all feels like a blur to me. Most of us spent the entire two weeks of Christmas vacation sick. Mr K came down with strep throat again just before Christmas, but thankfully the antibiotics had him feeling well enough to head to Christmas eve dinner at my brothers. Well Christmas day around lunch I started feeling like poop. I got a little worried because it was my last day of my antibiotic for my strep throat. Thankfully the strep never came back but the flu set in hard. It was horrible feeling so bad on Christmas day, but what was worse was my husband and daughter getting sick a few days later. We all got the flu pretty bad, and are still fighting it almost 2 weeks later. I hear from some that is lasts for 3 weeks. Thankfully I buy tissues in bulk!! Miss E got it the worst though, she still doesn't have her voice back. We had a day where nothing would help her fever. It is so hard to have a sick child. Really hard when they are not old enough to tell you what is going on. There was a day of telling us hurts, we just could not figure out what hurt.
Well back to school tomorrow for Mr K and I am back at the regular grind. My to do list is large. I had really high hopes for getting so much done and being really organized to start 2009 both personally and professionally but when the entire family gets sick it makes is really hard to get anything done. A sick clingy 1 year old makes it impossible for me to do anything but cuddle. If I tried to one hand type an email she would take my arm and wrap it around her back so that I would just cuddle. It was kind of cute!
Mr K was amazing though. He was stuck at home a lot and really was a great sport about it. He got some great gifts from Santa and us that got a lot of use. My favorite was a Crayola Dry Erase lap kit that he spent endless hours writing his name, his sisters name, our names, and working on the alphabet and numbers on. He also drew some great pictures. It made me realize that the only problem with that is the only way to remember it all was to take a photo with my camera!
So I will hopefully have enough strength tomorrow (that has been the hardest part about still feeling like crap, lack of strength to do anything) to do some stuff around the house. At least we got the decorations down and packed back away for another year. The kids were sad to see Santa go!
In the next couple of weeks I hope to have a few things to share with all of my wonderful customers. We are putting a new spin on the "print your own" option. Sharing a bunch more new designs. And the most exciting is our "wall art" for all those parents who want something a little different or wish that they had gotten a Grace Announcement designed birth announcement.
Well back to school tomorrow for Mr K and I am back at the regular grind. My to do list is large. I had really high hopes for getting so much done and being really organized to start 2009 both personally and professionally but when the entire family gets sick it makes is really hard to get anything done. A sick clingy 1 year old makes it impossible for me to do anything but cuddle. If I tried to one hand type an email she would take my arm and wrap it around her back so that I would just cuddle. It was kind of cute!
Mr K was amazing though. He was stuck at home a lot and really was a great sport about it. He got some great gifts from Santa and us that got a lot of use. My favorite was a Crayola Dry Erase lap kit that he spent endless hours writing his name, his sisters name, our names, and working on the alphabet and numbers on. He also drew some great pictures. It made me realize that the only problem with that is the only way to remember it all was to take a photo with my camera!
So I will hopefully have enough strength tomorrow (that has been the hardest part about still feeling like crap, lack of strength to do anything) to do some stuff around the house. At least we got the decorations down and packed back away for another year. The kids were sad to see Santa go!
In the next couple of weeks I hope to have a few things to share with all of my wonderful customers. We are putting a new spin on the "print your own" option. Sharing a bunch more new designs. And the most exciting is our "wall art" for all those parents who want something a little different or wish that they had gotten a Grace Announcement designed birth announcement.
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